I'm home...yep yep. It doesn't feel like Christmas Eve at all. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel about everything with my parents and step-parents, either. Everything's muchos confusing and everyone's starting to pack up our stuff and I'm pretty sure I'm going crazy....

I keep thinking something will come and change everything and it will all be better, but it's not, and I'm starting to realize that I am going to leave, and it's not going to get better, and I'm going to have to make the best of it, but it's hard to see what that is right now. I so much want to be happy again. There's nothing/no one I can run to that will make it all better and I can't hide because the problems are constantly there.


On a brighter note, I heard Tonight Tonight in the car today....