Friday, February 27, 2004

A few brief notes on today:

ate hot sauce, linnhe's dying, i've died
mia's seeing the sounds mia's seeing the sounds mia's seeing THE SOUNDS
i think the walkmen are playing tonight at 930
talked to someone who had crapped themself recently
going to dad's--kinda happy kinda don't wanna. don't wanna say goodbye to aaron.
dont like being away from home.
i'm a homebody
ima robot
kill hannah
killing heidi and mandy's dreams of three foot dreds
roxie's a mrs.

Tuesday, February 24, 2004

The Emperor of Ice-Cream, by Wallace Stevens

Call the roller of big cigars,
The muscular one, and bid him whip
In kitchen cups concupiscent curds.
Let the wenches dawdle in such dress
As they are used to wear, and let the boys
Bring flowers in last month's newspapers.
Let be be finale of seem.
The only emperor is the emperor of ice-cream.

Take from the dresser of deal,
Lacking the three glass knobs, that sheet
On which she embroidered fantails once
And spread it so as to cover her face.
If her horny feet protrude, they come
To show how cold she is, and dumb.
Let the lamp affix its beam.
The only emperor is the emperor of ice-cream.
HMSwrecked: did i tell you i got gish on vinyl?
PeLo LoCo87: no ma'am, you did not
HMSwrecked: it's gorgeous.
HMSwrecked: even though i don't have a record player.
PeLo LoCo87: so have you not listened to it?
PeLo LoCo87: my brother has 3 I think
PeLo LoCo87: and I think they're all broken
HMSwrecked: no i haven't.
HMSwrecked: makes me sad. but it's so gorgeous.
PeLo LoCo87: one might work, actually
HMSwrecked: steal it!
PeLo LoCo87: you should come over tomorrow so we can try it out = )
HMSwrecked: haha that sounded dirty.
PeLo LoCo87: as it should

Pick a favorite band and answer only using that band's song titles: Smashing Pumpkins

1. Are you male or female: To Shelia

2. Describe yourself: Geek U.S.A.

3. How do some people feel about you: Where Boys Fear to Tread

4. How do you feel about yourself: With Every Light

5. Describe your girlfriend/boyfriend/interest: Let Me Give the World to You

6. Where would you rather be: Galapogos

7. Describe what you want to be: Perfect

8. Describe how you live: Cherub Rock

9. Describe how you love: Sweet, Sweet

10. Share a few words of wisdom: Stand Inside Your Love

Monday, February 23, 2004

"Pretty Good Year" by Tori and deliciously unproductive afternoon naps. We've started Le Petit Prince a francais et je suis très passionate. Mais, j'ai voulu avoir moins gens dans ma classe, parce-que c'est beaucoup des personnes qui ne connaient rien de la literature. Je ne sais pas pourquoi quelqu'un n'aime pas lire. Mais, il est d'accord, parce-que j'ai christa [et Tori], et elle est toute que quelqu'u peut vouloir dans une amie. Chaque jours je fais les reves que nous sommes ensembles, encore, et que nous pouvons faire quelque chose que nous voyons avec leurs temp. Je veux etre libré de mon école. oui, il n'est pas ca mal, et je suis reconnaisant pour m'education. Mais je désire avoir quelque chose plus en ma vie.
Still, pretty good year

due to complaints, here is the translation of the above paragraphe:

"Pretty Good Year" by Tori and deliciously unproductive afternoon naps. We've started The Little Prince and I'm very excited. but, I wanted to have less people in my class, because there are many people who don't know anything about literature. I don't know why anyone wouldn't like to read. But, it's okay, because I have Christa [and Tori], and she is all that anyone could want in a friend. Every day I have dreams that we're together, again,a nd that we can do anything we want with our time. I want to be free from my school. yes, it isn't that bad, and i'm thankful for my education. but i ache to have something more in my life.
Still, pretty good year

Saturday, February 21, 2004

Soo Mia and I dressed up lookin super-fine....went to super-lame star search and the circuit and the galleria. the whole time i was just wanting to go home--not for lack of good company, but nowhere we went was really hoppin', if you know what I mean. We came home at 10 or so after picking up Rebel Without A Cause and gave JD his birthday cake with twenty-three candles on it [none paper, thanks so much--but one was upside down]. She left at eleven or so, at which time Mander came over to spend the night. We stayed up muchos late talking with the boys and falling asleep in our pizza. I had a good time all around. Oh yes, and today we were en route to market and ended up bumming around the galleria again. It was better this time around, because I was wearing pants and wasn't so girlish self-concious about my body. I'm so stupey sometimes. And we talked about how wierd it is to become what we daydreamed about being as little girls [16 year olds who can DRIVE, and carry purses, and look uber-hot while strutting through the mall] and how it still has a little bit of glamour in it.

After momma's trip to Borders, our family is now the proud owner[s?] of Shadow Puppets and a few short stories and the novella of Ender's Game and I'm already more than halfway done and it's wonderful. Mmmm good stuff.

Thursday, February 19, 2004

ohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmyGOSH. I loved it so much. I can't even put it into words. I felt like such a country bumpkin at first, but by the time we had walked to dinner [after being in the city for about an hour] I didn't care and wanted to live in New York and strut down the streets with the best. It was really fantastic. As for Phantom, I couldn't have asked for more. The Phantom's voice was so powerful. Christine [Kristine?] wasn't Sarah Brightman, but she was wonderful and I loved it so much and I'm so happy that I had forgotten the ending and I cried and nightdreamed the whole way home and I'm running on three hours of sleep and I've been wearing these clothes for two days but it was worth it and more. Ah. No words for it. I wish you could've been there, and I got you a playbill, and I will get you one next time and you should've heard the music, we could've ascended, hand-in-hand.

Friday, February 13, 2004

Going to a formal tonight instead of a show. Decisions decisions.

Letters to Cleo and half-naked freshly-groomed girls right now.
Be my co-pilot, come be in my dream, you look so beautiful there....

I'm wearing the dress I wore to my dad's wedding--the enormous green one. I've lost weight since last year. Lost shape, anyways, and that's all I measure anyways. =)

Tuesday, February 10, 2004

_______Your Life_______

[x] they call me: Gert
[x] sex: lady
[x] my first breath of air: 25 july 1987
[x] status: dateless.
[x] best friends: christa, ariel, patrick, mandy, warner, mia, roxie, amanda, ryan


[x] most memorable memory: amazing ZWAN and billy making love to my ears, flogging molly live and in the flesh, summers
[x] first words uttered: dada. he was vaccuming.


[x] love is: jealous of me
[x] First love: pasta
[x] love or lust?: love
[x] best love song: you're my red slurpee...oo whoa oh
[x] is it possible to be in love w/ more than one person at the same time: i've never done it. but how can you judge when you've never experienced it
[x] when love hurts, you: ruin a bunch of good music by attaching sad memories to it, eat lots, get fat, cut your hair, and move on.

_______Opposite Sex_______
[x] turn ons: fitted pants, worn-in tshirts, musical ability/taste, the ability to write words that will give my brain orgasms
[x] the sweetest thing a member of the opposite sex can do for you?: dance and sing with/to me to weezer's blue album

_______Picky Picky_______

[x] dog or cat: dog.
[x] house party or club: i haven't been to a party in about twelve thousand years. so i don't think i'm educated enough to have an opinion.
[x] freak or slow dance: there are other types of dances, y'know--like polka, and jitterbug, and swing. and kung-fu-ing it up with chad.

_______More About YOU!_______ [How great..]

[x] have you ever almost died? choked on candy when i was 3, almost fell out of a 17th story window as a little girl because i was leaning out looking.
[x] daughter's name? Rainer
[x] what are you most scared of? gollum; not being able to get away.
[x] who do you dream about? everything. see below
[x] is cheerleading a sport? ? what kind of stupid question is that?
[x] how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? ask mr. owl
[x]What makes you laugh?: roxie, kyle, b. doug, stupid puns
[x]Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours?: billy, or tori amos, or Boy of Choice
[x]If the Internet were sex... I would: still not get enough.
[x]Have you ever seen a dead body?: on saturday
[x]What is something scientists need to invent?: a way to travel through space NOT in a ship
[x]What should we do with stupid people?: put them in the stocks with dictionaries in front of them
[x]What happens after you die?: call me if you want my whole opinion.
[x]How big is your bed? Big enough?: quite. i love it. could be bigger, tho.
[x]How long do you think you will live?: longer than you
I've never really considered, no, scratch that, applied, the idea of not seeing people ever again after high school. is it me, because i've distanced myself? i'm just wondering. i really don't have an answer. i'm going to miss mrs. raver more than i will michaela, but i talk to her more. interesting idea. i'm not sad about it, i don't think. because you keep making acquaintences all your life, don't you? don't you?

someone give me an answer.
Just got really depressed randomly. Slash reading depressing posts on other people's blogs and xangas and various online journals and having to decide how long I want to stay at dad's this weekend. Ah this keeps getting more and more complicated.

Today I took frozen peaches from the cafeteria home in my lunchbox with a stolen spoon and ate them on my bed while listening to Sleater Kinney.

I had like twelve dreams last night. In the first, I was talking to b. doug online only to leave and go to another dream and a darkness concert where i found roxie across the dance floor, and proceeded to do front hand-springs amidst the moshing kids only to land with my feet on her husband/kyle's shoulders and stand up like that. Then I turned, and found out that "The Darkness" was merely a black curtain with the music playing behind it. The third was about orcs attacking my house in droves, led by Melissa Kreschmer, who looked very pretty, and spending a long time trying to find a place to hide, or at least something to fight with, and it ended with us on my parents' balcony with orcs running around underneath. I woke up when they finally broke through the glass doors, and I was staring at my closet and was wondering if I could hide Ali up there and if they'd think to look for her there. Then I looked at the clock and realized it was time to get up for Seminary. So I was scuzzy today and didn't shower and my hair has leftover wax in it from yesterday.

I have lots of things to do for New Beginings tonight and I'm the worst person in the whole wide world and such a slacker. I was supposed to bring in clothes that I've made, and I realized that Alex has one of the shirts and the rest I haven't really made from scratch, I've just altered, except for the blue skirt. Ack. By the way, elle, I want that shirt back. Pronto. Smack smack.

Friday, February 06, 2004

Listening to Flogging Molly and the insanely long guitar solo of Black Friday Rule.

I got woken up last night at like ten by bro. buerger and we watched ER with my mom and talked about Lord Foul's Bane. ER was really good, too. And he was right, I don't hate my hair now that I've been styling it. I used lots o' hairspray and teasing yesterday so it got all BAM and sticky outy.

Michelle's viewing is tonight. So that'll be hard, but I'm really looking forward to seeing the Gordys. I hate how once I deal with a problem I expect myself to be fixed and all better. Because I don't really want to cry tonight, or tomorrow, and I doubt that'll happen because mom and I were talking about it on the way home the other night and I got all teary-eyed. Sigh.

Snow day, tho. Slash rain day.

I went out with Mander yesterday. We went to Salvation Army and I got the coolest shirt. It's long-sleeved and white with red polka dots. I also got this dreamy coat that's knee-legnth and blue. I'm such a shopaholic. Plus we got choclate and brought it to Mia. I haven't eaten yet, except for that Milky Way Midnight...ohh man that was good.

I hate how I write so lackadasically [word?] because I can type almost as fast as I think. It all comes out in one big jumble.

for i am the king and shall long may i reign

Wednesday, February 04, 2004

Today sucked. As expected. Buergers came over, though, and that was fun, even if they were only here for two seconds. I couldn't find the OC [cause i watch it now--come join us on the bandwagon!] But I think I'm getting the stomach flu. Which is really terrible. Kyle developed new muscles from throwing up. And I haven't thrown up in like two years. So it's that or ....well, ask roxie. she seems to specialize in things of that nature. or BRANDON ARTHUR who we talk about, huh, kyle?

Punkyelhsa: J slash K!
HerSilentStars: ell oh ell!
HerSilentStars: stupid technology/pop culture.
Punkyelhsa: as eleven year olds.

Anyone remember the good ole ICQ? Isn't that where we met Hong? Oh, no, it was Mark [c?].

Nonetheless. Good times.

Had a good time on the phone with roxie tonight. Watched I Love the 80s! (STRIKES BACK!) together, slash I ignored her as I flipped channels. She makes me laugh muchos.

Still hate my hair. Bro. Buerger says that I'll like it within a few days, but as is, I just kinda want to vommit on it. So maybe I'll try that, since I'm getting the stomach flu anyways, and can't use the pomeade effectively.
Yes, I know, I was being brave, and I was taking a risk and last time I really loved it and ....

i hate my haircut. stupid, trivial, tell me about it. only before i could hide behind it somewhat, and now i have le fringe and it doesn't cover my forehead, and it's such an all-or-nothing attitude, and i feel naked and boyish. my face feels too wide and my head just keeps getting bigger every time i glance at a mirror. only i don't glance. i pour over them, trying ot fix my risk-taking.

Monday, February 02, 2004

i missed it. bummer summer.