Thursday, July 31, 2003

today i wanted to have a picnic with amelia and ry-bone but mia went off and ditched us for her more posh friends. hahaha sike we're probably gonna do it at two or so. until then, mum explained her frustrations about money and still having to be a good mom and wanting the house to be clean so i'm gonna do my best to fix up my room and then maybe even pack for the beach a little! woo! i'm so excited. i think that i'll have more fun this year because i'm so looking forward to it and me and kyle and david are all better friends. that and david can drive, so we'll be able to cruise whatever circuit they have down there in our cool gray minivan. today i wanted to bring the shirt with me that i'm gonna put scraps all over and have mia gimmie ideas on what to do with it and maybe even sew a little while we're on our picnic. speaking of clothes given to me, i'm wearing ryan's arcadia shirt right now that he gave me to think of him. aww. he's such a sweetheart. i had a good time last night, we watched charlie's angels and ate easy mac and more or less did nothing for a good 4 hours. hrmm i love picnics. but what to wear....

last night me and ryan were talking about how we wish that like 2 days out of the month in summer were like 50 degrees so we could wear all our cool sweaters and hoodies that we miss in these balmy summer days. last night i wore my purty cableknit sweater and i might bring it along with me again today, even tho it'll probably be waaay too hot. but hey-o, it's gravvy baby. i wonder if ryan would be into doing his laundry here while i cleaned and packed. hrmm

current mood: summery
current music: 20 below by teen idols

Wednesday, July 30, 2003

woo! i'm at ry-bone's house! i'm stealing a coolio shirt from him that i'm gonna put fun patches all over. not like band patches, like just pieces of fun cloth. yay! and i'm taking in a shirt for him hope i don't mess it up. i realy don't have anything to say except I LOVE RY-BONE he is sooo hottie. hot hot hot. is this tea hot or cold? ow ow ow hot hot hot i am RICKY martin. jeeze i'm a loser. and ryan's not fat. and mia should come over. the end.

current mood: president of the ry-bone fan club
current music: break it off by koufax

Tuesday, July 29, 2003

YAY! COMPUTER COMPUTER COMPUTER I LOVE YOU FOREVER! Ahhh I missed the beautiful beautiful internet. I was itching last night to get online and ahh feels so wonderful. Hrmm let's see

moved to a new house
am obsessed with volleyball
love mia forever cause she's so super much fun
got the coolest shirt ever from checkered past
turned 16! woo! i can date now, kiddos
am going to the beach on sunday, super excited
totally bonded with chickies at girl's camp and found out who i'm hanging out with till forever yay
still haven't recieved an email from you-know-who
christa lost her lip virginity [perfectly, might i add]
am jamming to the mintuemen and mighty mighty bosstones and mxpx
got oasis's what's the story morning glory for sappy purposes
tanned today
am wearing a whale on my shirt
got bailed on by ryan but we're supposed to play tomorrow
want to have a picnic sometime soon
we have two bathrooms now! alright!
i'm not making any sense because i'm so excited and forgot how to type. woot woot.
teenage politics--too confusing. politics schmolitics it's too confuuusing
ahh gotta love good ole mxpx. christian punk rock and roll. ha.
got a cell phone. it's krissie's old one. they stole it from her and gave it to me. yay for being spoiled.
paranoid android slash amanda.
wearing the coolest bikini top in the world as a bra. it's all stripey and mod and i love it. except my shirt is beige and you can totally see through it.
this is awesome! david has all the MP3s from Virginia and like i'm listening to mxpx and like the pietasters and matthew good band and the verve and jane's addiction catch22 and jeeze. who am i kidding, i did too have good taste in music back in the day. ahh man now i really really miss mandy. she's all far away in florida and i want to play with her. at least she'll be at my luau. mar. we had such good times back in the day. this shirt is so her too. austin's pretending to skank around the boy's room [where computer is].
my grandma's awesome. we've been hanging out lately. she's so much fun. she took me out shopping monday and i got 2 skirts and this bra thing and a sweater that was way overpriced but she got it for me because we didn't know when it was going on sale and it might be gone by then. it's dreamy and warm and cableknit.

this is love if you want it
don't sound like no sonnet
my love

holy crap i love weezer so much. by the way that was the verve. but now i'm listening to you gave your love to me softly

all i have to do is think of you
we had just one month
but it goes on and on and on
you gave your love to me softly
lalala you sang to me
baby don't you cry

i'm sooo taking this with me to the beach. man. i half got the sweater for the beach, hoping it'd be really really cold at night when it took me guitar to the beach and sat and strummed like a good emo kid would. you take your car to work i take my board. i soo wanna cruise with christa to this blaring and like hang out with alex...bleh. but he'd be really fun to dance to weezer with i bet. today on the way to mutual we were in kyle's cool car i decorated with all my stickets and the monkees and then ccr came on and we turned it way way up and were all dancing and i was doing the swim and the monkey and man my family's fun to hang out with.

today me and kyle watched a chevy chase movie called nothing but trouble that was horribly awesome. it was really really scary and had dan akroyd and demi moore and they get trapped by this backwater judge and it scares the poop out of me. also has the worst makeup since sloth applied on two cereal-obsessed fatties. man.

i'm so wearing the same outfit tomorrow. who needs baths. speaking of which, today i had the ca-razy idea to take a bath in our swim suits...then i forgot about it and we were playing volleyball and got really hot and were all still wearing pajams [except ash was wearing a bikini top under her shirt!] so we went and played with the hose in the driveway and washed our hair and mum took pictures and it was way fun. i'm cleaning myself like that from now on.
rivers cumo is so hot. cuomo? whatever. he's babealicious.

i totally lost my will to read. i guess i'm just fidgety. i've been on the same chapter of the princess bride ["the festivites"] for like all of july. which is sad. i'm totally in a jeans and tshirt mood right now. christa doesn't understand the mood when i try to convey it to her, but i really can't describe it better than that. weezer about fits...the promise ring is too emotional and luckie strike is too not. so yeah. weezer. and dancing and happy. and jeans and tshirts and sandals when the weather is fitting. i suppose that's about right.

current mood: dance dance dance
current music: surfboard usa by weezer

Monday, July 21, 2003

Today I'm missing Christa and am jealous of Jonathan. He was complaining about not seeing her for 14 days at a time and mar. I just wanna drive around jamming to Weezer or ZWAN or some such awesome band. Right now I'm avoiding work and watching everyone else take out boxes. yay.

current mood: lonely
current music: come with me zwan

Sunday, July 20, 2003

woo! went out with ryan and kyle and mia last night to the jefferson carnival. we had a grand old time and i argued religion with an evangalist for about an hour, causing everyone to go to hell for thinking mean thoughts towards me. a-men. ferris wheels still scare me out of my wits, no change from last year when i was clutching the railing till my knuckles turned white. we jammed to ace of base on the way home and ahh it was way more fun than i expected.

so yeah we moved! which means no internet till thursday. and the only phones we're using are me mum's and stan's cell phones. number to mom-o's is 542-3800. that scared me at first then i realized only people here would figure it out--hip hip hurray for area codes. oh! and tuesday is camp where i am going to be a ycl and 16!! WOO! i'm in a super duper good mood and yay only 5 days till i can get my permit and date. woot woot. i'm sorta liking our new house--much bigger, and a volleyball court's always a plus but i was crying when i woke up in the middle of the night last night and rolled into the wall expecting to touch my stereo. mar. i hate change. anyhoodles, yup yup yup...

still no word on the boy front.

current mood: energized
current music: it's hard to say by sister hazel

Saturday, July 19, 2003

with needles drying out my wishes
centrifuge them back to you
you're idiots.

i had a good time for the most part tonight. ryan came over and i showed him ali's drawing of their eternal lasting love and he was really flattered. we were supposed to go to checkered past but that kinda fell through and we went to borders and saw fumey 1 and 2 and then sat around reading the onion books and randomly laughing. my favorite was either the special olympics being fixed article or christopher reeves being welded to the top of the washington monument. ahh i love ryan so much. makes me happy that he gets me on like, every single level. sigh. he burned me the yeah yeah yeahs deluxe cd and i remembered it this time but now i can't find it. hrmm. man. anyhoodles we went to visit fruity and had a really really good time. i took a picture of them together and they were hitting on each other and dan cleaned the same chair like a thousand times to stay and talk to us. it was really really fun. fruity bought me a lemonade and i ate all of ryan's fries and ahh just good times all around. he's leaving in something like a week so i think i'm eating every meal at wendy's. aw good times. we jammed to geri halewell on the way home and i was supposed to talk to him online but austin stole the computer and ah whatever. too late now. but i love him.

current mood: agitated
current music: la girl by the distillers

Thursday, July 17, 2003

woo so today i wish i hadn't really gone out with rox and mander. i had a really good time last night tho, watching gone with the wind with kyle and roxie and not entirely understanding the really really late half-drunken sleep filled conversation i had with roxie last night in bed. man i was tired. i don't remember any of it except "i'm not tir--snore snore". whatever. but yeah when we went to that stupey tattoo shop i had stan come pick me up. we went around looking for antiques and i almost got this postcard for mandy but i forgot i had money so i put it back. it was really cool tho. it was like "I don't miss you because i'm here and you're there" or something. but yeah. then we went out to eat and we both got these humungo sandwhiches that were deliciously fattening and man my stomach got bloated. oh yeah we went to the mall [we=mander and rox and me] and i saw the bra i'm wearing on the rack. crazy stuff. this morning roxie or mander [i don't member who] when we were like looking at our stomachs and my coolio tat that mia gave me was like "i really like your body." cool compliment, neh? anyhoodles. now i'm at stan's office and not really doing anything. please forgive the lack of poetry in this post but hey whatever. i'm not really in the best mood as of this afternoon because of stupey people being really dumb and making stupid decisions. yay for upcomming prayer and scriptures.

we're moving in 2 days and i'm turning 16 in 8. whoo! yesterday i almost started crying when i started to take my mural off my wall. it really really depresses me. i'm only going to be able to put things up on one wall in the new house so it's gonna be like floor to celing and i still have to keep some stuff in a box somewhere. i mean i have like 5 posters along with a katrillion little things and posters my friends have made me. speaking of friends...

+your three best qualities = funny,understanding, romantic
+three worst qualities = impatient, stubborn, egocentric at times
+three things you are often complimented for = being rad, making things for people, looking good.
+a compliment you got that made you blush = aw i can't tell.
+you get embarrassed when = i'll do a dance or something for one person and then we're in a big crowd and that person's all like, "ryan, do that thing!" and i don't want to and then everyone gets mad.
+makes you happy = phone calls from ashley
+upsets you = the ruptured disc in my back.

aw that's from ry-bones livejournal. i love him so much. i feel bad because i kinda didn't call him back yesterday. mayhap he'd enjoy going to the jefferson carnival with us, mia? if that's okay. yeah. i'm excited about that but not so much about the moving things all day long. it's very tedious. oh well.

current mood: estranged
current music: absolutely nothing by immediate space

Tuesday, July 15, 2003

i love roxie. don't be sad i love you he's so lame if he doesn't get how crazily awesome you are. lame anyways. i'm better than he is anyways, who got you a go-go dress for no reason whatsoever and plays re-posessing games with you? this girl, that's who. anyways, the point is, don't let the man getcha down. you're good. you're worth it and more. i guess i can't really make you believe it, but i live it every day so there's your proof.

anyways, i love you.

for real.

Monday, July 14, 2003

i got woken up this morning by ryan's phone call at way too early in the morning, and he came over soon thereafter. we just kinda bummed around [well, he did---i cleaned my room!] and then went out to visit mia at work and ate at taco bell. i swear if the same people worked there all the time we could so be like "the usual" whenever we order. yay for stuffed burritos and fajitas. ryan made fun of my listening to emo but i made up for it by screaming dashboard confessional at him when his hair was down later. we drove around and hung out at his house. we went to target and got him a digital camera just for fun and we jammed to hot hot heat as we drove through red lion. he burned me a yeah yeah yeahs deluxe CD [2 EPs and 1 LP] but i left it in his car. we stopped by mia's and picked her up and then came back here and talked about OBGYNs and ovaries and tampons for like an hour. ryan left soon thereafter and me and mia pretended to clean my room. i'm also rather proud to say i got over my girliness and called the cheer up emo kid and left a message. bravo ashley. i told mumsies and she said he's probably on vacation. then the buergers came over [well, taylor and doug] and we all played big booty and the screaming game and then hung out at the new house and played volleyball. i'm not so proud to say i actually peed my pants for the first time in years. my pals and family are so funny that when i was doubled over guffawing my bladder control was relaxed for a split second but hey, that's all it takes. it's not like it was showing or anything but yeah. i ran into the bathroom to relieve myself. ohh good times. and david kicked the ball and fell flat on his back. after laying in the dirt for about three seconds you hear a monotone "crap". oh man good times. i kinda got mad at mom because she's been really stressed and not too nice lately. i told her she yelled at me this morning when i came into her room crying because of a bad dream and she didn't even realize it. stan said he said yeah he realized that but he was half asleep too and just kinda confused by it. man i hate nightmares. anyhoodles, we just kinda layed around the house and now we're here watching THE BEST MOVIE EVER, SPY KIDS 2!!!!!!! WOO!!!!!!! so today was pretty fun all in all. i really missed ryan while we were apart and i'm glad to be back with him. even if he left before the screaming game [which was a big hit].

kyle's been bugging me to find out about more shows cause he wants to go to one again. ahh i wish so badly that flogging molly, the saw doctors, and black 47 was my first show as opposed to lonestar and phil vassar. bleh. well they've been better since then. but if you have any info on people playing soon, do share. he was bummed about missing the violent femmes, as was i. now i'm going to pee my pants [again] so i bid thee farewell.

current mood: urine-filled
current music: bandages by hot hot heat

Sunday, July 13, 2003

and all the times you held my hand
i'm so over it
and all the times you told me that
you like the way i laugh
and all the things we used to do
i'm so over it
and i'm so over it
and i'm so over you


Saturday, July 12, 2003

my favorite part of the weekend so far was definitely playing badmiton with pavid beurger in my grandma's yard slash yelling at each other and playing the depth perception catch game with kyle and david. this is how you play: everyone shuts one eye and play catch. yay! i got phones and kyle's humungo boots thrown at me and it ended up we were playing the stevie wonder [steven king? b.b. king?] version where we just threw pillows at each other with our eyes closed and ended up getting vicious especially after david and i both opened up our eyes. ahh good times. =) youth confrence was alright, i did have some new spiritual insights [favorite part of "I Believe In Christ" is now 'i believe in christ, so come what may] and danced with like three boys, all of whom i knew. found out joe/ashley is really really cool and kyle got called a lamanite behind his back because of his hair. or so we're assuming. so whee tomorrow's church and it's so summer and i don't have to do anything ever again. alicia buschey was asking me my favorite candy and what have you because I'M TURNING SIXTEEN IN 13 DAYS and my birthday's while we're at girl's camp. woot woot YCL-dom, here we come. i'm really excited. and in a good mood. i also want to play with mia. so we're gonna try and set that up on monday.

current mood: jovial
current music: the likes of you again by flogging molly

Friday, July 11, 2003

i'm such a stupid stupid stupid girl and i hate myself for it. ew. i'm at youth confrence...woot.

Thursday, July 10, 2003

so i've won the laziest anything ever award. i found my journal [!] with all of the numbers and addresses and what have you and I was going to email Alex and Pollykate but now I can't because it's all the way upstairs. woe is me.

off to youth confrence till saturday. i'm looking forward to it, but not to the non-jean rule. also: the violent femmes are playing in D.C. saturday night. dunno if we'll be able to and we probably won't but oh they're so awesome.

current mood: lazy
current music: simple by division minuscula

Wednesday, July 09, 2003

we sat there, uninhibited by anything.

no shoes, no bras, no worries
just lauther and smiles and ice cream and a light summer drizzle that was really more refreshing than wetting. we laughed at everything and pretended that the piles of rocks behind us were diamonds and opals and rubies and more valuable than anything we had ever seen. and we were sitting on them.

and then she had to go to work and i to do laundry, back to our growing up lives. back to yelling and complicated tears and new situations that you're not entirely sure you want to be in.

but you know what? it's alright. i'm alright. she's alright. the two don't have to be seperate. we can have our five-year-old moments while trying to wade through our almost-adult problems. because ignoring isn't the same thing as knowing, and still looking above.
yay i love ariel forever! and mia! oh man. last night chit chatted on the phone and today i woke up with her storming in my room and laying down next to me. we went to roma's with ali and then sat outside the exxon and ate ice cream and collected precious jewels. momma drove her to work and dropped me off at grammy's and we hung out till about an hour ago. we watched a midsummer night's dreamy [that was originally a typo and i thought it looked so pretty i couldn't change it. but i know it's 'dream'] and grandma didn't really like it cause she couldn't understand what they were saying since it was more or less the original script. and then i started spouting shakesperean sonnets in my head about everything that was happening as i tend to do with anything that i like. that is, i envelop it and pretend i created it.

i'm doing my best not to think about stupey stupey boys that make you think too much. i went up to my room last night with the intentions of a writer, wanting to complain in ink about what they make me wait for without realizing it but fortunately got distracted by miss ariel's phone call. so right now i love all my friends for making my mouth laugh and my ego inflate.

current mood: friendly
current music: i'm sorry by the red hot valentines
i was gonna put the lyrics to i'm sorry by the red hot valentines on here but i can't find a master copy to make sure my ears aren't retarded. listen to it or find 'em yourself, i don't care.
yay! stayed up on the phone with ariel till all hours of the night being hooligans talking about kids today and what's with their rock and roll music and how crazy is it that we have the same brain.
i love my friend.

current mood: appreciated
current music: where is my mind by ghoti hook

Tuesday, July 08, 2003

so! i'm officially in on the suprise. that no one else knew about except the family and possibly warner. for ashley's 16th birthday, they'er throwing her a luau!! our new ginormous yard will serve quite nicely, what with having room for roasting a pig and a volleyball court. if you're reading this you're probably invited. seriously--including warner and christa. please come, i'm rather excited and you have no idea how big of a let-down it would be if you didn't come. ideas are welcomed! it was mom's idea to roast a pig and i thought it sounded pretty cool so! if you're one of my three vegetarian friends, please don't be offended at my animal-killing ways. if you have any hawaiian music, please share. so far on the playlist in my head i've got some elvis and ccr but i'm kinda lost beyond that. oh gracious me.

so yesterday i pulled out stan's beatles sheet music and tried to teach myself across the unvierse. me being an idiot didn't actually listen to the song before i tried it. so i spent about 20 minutes trying to pluck it before i got david to come up and try and show me how. so yeah. turns out you strum. i'm so tarded. but i've got D and D minor down so far. All bow down before me. Man I feel so musically inept when I listen to stuff like CCR and Sublime and Smashing Pumpkins and compare it to my attempts at making music come out of the steel stringed abomination that is my yamaha. off ashley goes to steal stan's alvarez. also: if you have any guitar skills or tips you'd like to share with me, it would be much appreciated.

current mood: excited
current music: clocks by coldplay

Monday, July 07, 2003

cute without the e by taking back sunday is the sexiest song i've ever heard
Woo! I love David for having an AOL account! Our internet is all not working so I'm using the phone line and that demon that is America Online.

But now I'm just kinda sitting here...and wondering what I ever saw in the internet. I mean, it's shallow, it's rude, we don't even have that much in common....I'm thinking of calling it quits. Don't tell, though. I still have a little soul-searching to do.

current mood: pensive
current music: you're having the time of my life by jets to brazil
To elaborate on the last post--

Got back from EFY/Maryland last night! Made a new friend named Alex who's my twin in every way except he super duper hearts Dashboard. But hey, it's all gravy, right? Horrible part is I lost my journal with his number in it [not to mention everyone else's] so I can't get in touch with him till he gets in touch with me. Sigh. Plus our lineternet's still broken. Oh yeah! We're moving! We looked at a house today and I'm pretty sure we're gonna get it. It's only 4 bedrooms, which is kinda a squeeze for 8-10 people, and so everyone gets to share. BUT! It has kiwi plants and plum trees and grapes and blueberries and a volleyball court and several fishponds. And major closet space. What more could you want, really?

Krissie and I decided we're going to try to keep on our wristbands till next year's EFY. They're plastic so I'm super hoping they don't like grow mold or anything. Also: my awesome red bracelet that I so super heart is starting to break. The elastic bands are popping and meh. =( I can always re-do it with string but it's not the same. mar, makes me sad.

EFy was soooo incredibly awesome I can't even get over it. Just the boost I need. Also: turns out there's real boys that are interesting and funny and enjoyable to be around that have testimonies and morals. Huh. Who'da thunk it....not this girl, that's who. Oh yeah I got to be majorly good friends with Pollykate. We ate kurds every day and talked in southern gone with the wind accents and made up jokes that absolutely no one thought was funny but us. man i love her.

last night i grabbed one of those buzz markers and a clipboard and psychoanalyzed everyone in my family. my mom's racist and afraid of midgets, lissa sets unattainable goals [admires pochahontas] david's aneorixic and austin got prescribed 700mg of ridelin anally a day. yay! i'm so good at this stuff.

current mood: refreshed
current music: down on the corner by ccr [in my head]

Saturday, July 05, 2003

So I found a guitar-playing Mormon boy with an oh-so-marketable major who can carry on good conversations. Among other things.